The Mad Vortex » in the closet

Comfort

celiapleete — Thu, 09 Sep 2010 18:28:34 +0000

“Don’t worry, Ricky. Stop playing that sad song on the concertina. When the governess isn’t looking, I swear most honorably that I’ll let you wear my ruffliest dress again.”

Separated at Birth?

celiapleete — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 16:03:46 +0000

Dead Or Alive’s resident tranny Peter Burns…and the “Pirate Nun,” EWTN’s Mother Angelica?

I Knew This Was The Most Becoming Suit…

celiapleete — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 19:01:18 +0000

…Because Mrs. Leslie, who many had declared rather “strange,” came closer…closer to me, pressing her heaving bosom against my back, breathing heavily.
“You’re pretty as a picture, my dear.”
That day, I lost my innocence; my picture of maidenhood tarnished by a burning desire to make love in this tweed getup. I had arrived. I never knew passion as wicked as that thrown upon me by a zaftig woman in a whimsical hat.

Triple Down.

celiapleete — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 17:37:21 +0000

The Drummond men were notoriously the strong, silent types.

When Grandpa Drummond broke his foot falling off his horse, Muffin, he got up, walked twelve miles, and wrapped up the swollen member in torn rags from the shed. He was up and at ‘em in two days.

When Pa Drummond had a massive head wound following a wayward shotgun shell, he summoned up the energy to walk twenty miles to Doc Finnegan’s and slur out what had happened. He was back to work within the week.

But Melvin Drummond had trumped them all, by not mentioning a word about his self-induced sex change operation with some rubbing alcohol and a pair of hedgeclippers.

In A Pinch.

celiapleete — Sun, 14 Mar 2010 17:59:02 +0000

During the photo shoot, Bertram suddenly let out a ringing peal of girlish laughter – as that rascal Mark naughtily found his “sweet spot.”

Alexandrie, Alexandra.

celiapleete — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 15:47:52 +0000

Jailbait and Switch.

celiapleete — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 18:06:52 +0000

As soon as he hit puberty, Mike made it abundantly clear that he wanted to henceforth be known as “Michelle.”

Globe Trotter.

celiapleete — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 18:58:03 +0000

“Yes, right about here. If the old saying is correct, then my one true love lives in Siam. Good gracious. That sounds about right. They’re pretty lenient there, age-wise.”

Sharpening.

celiapleete — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 02:40:38 +0000

“You know, Trent, watching you handle that weapon…it kinda makes me want to sharpen my own sword. The one made of pork.”

Problems at home

Josh Korwin — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 01:11:15 +0000

“That’s odd,” thought Gabriel. “He’s never this willing to help with the dishes. And he’s barely looking at me… sheepishly hiding his eyes behind the skillet… as if… as if something… no! He wouldn’t… not again. He couldn’t. Not after what happened in P-Town. I wish I hadn’t caught him. Oh how things would be different.”

“How was work today?” Gabriel asked, swallowing his doubts.

“Oh, you know, same old same old,” Thomas replied.

But the lingering stench of Brut on his collar said otherwise.